Posted by momoko_usada March 21, 2011 11:35am PDTReply | Report Abuse

"Your Horoscope For Today"

Aquarius
There's travel in your future when your tongue freezes to the back of a speeding bus
Fill that void in your pathetic life by playing Whack-A-Mole seventeen hours a day

Pisces
Try to avoid any Virgos or Leos with the Ebola virus
You are the true Lord of the Dance, no matter what those idiots at work say

Aries
The look on your face will be priceless when you find that forty pound watermelon in your colon
Trade toothbrushes with an albino dwarf, then give a hickey to Meryl Streep

Taurus
You will never find true happiness - what you gonna do, cry about it?
The stars predict tomorrow you'll wake up, do a bunch of stuff, and then go back to sleep

That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)
That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)
That's your horoscope for today

Gemini
Your birthday party will be ruined once again by your explosive flatulence
Your love life will run into trouble when your fiance hurls a javelin through your chest

Cancer
The position of Jupiter says you should spend the rest of the week face down in the mud
Try not to shove a roll of duct tape up your nose while taking your driver's test

Leo
Now is not a good time to photocopy your butt and staple it to your boss's face, oh no
Eat a bucket of tuna-flavored pudding, then wash it down with a gallon of strawberry Quik

Virgo
All Virgos are extremely friendly and intelligent - except for you
Expect a big surprise today when you wind up with your head impaled upon a stick

That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)
That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)
That's your horoscope for today

Now you may find it inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely
that the relative position of the planets and the stars could have
a special deep significance or meaning that exclusively applies to only you,
but let me give you my assurance that these forecasts and predictions
are all based on solid, scientific, documented evidence, so you would have
to be some kind of moron not to realize that every single one of them is absolutely true.

Where was I?

Libra
A big promotion is just around the corner for someone much more talented that you
Laughter is the very best medicine, remember that when your appendix bursts next week

Scorpio
Get ready for an unexpected trip when you fall screaming from an open window
Work a little harder on improving your low self-esteem, you stupid freak

Sagittarius
All your friends are laughing behind your back (kill them)
Take down all those naked pictures of Ernest Borgnine you've got hanging in your den

Capricorn
The stars say that you're an exciting and wonderful person, but you know they're lying
If I were you, I'd lock my doors and windows and never never never never never leave my house again

That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)
That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)
That's your horoscope for today

That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)
That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (yay yay yay yay yay)
That's your horoscope for today

Posted by brennan jt February 10, 2011 02:52pm PSTReply | Report Abuse

hey thnks for addin me

Posted by momoko_usada March 7, 2010 11:44am PSTReply | Report Abuse

hi ya sorry i dnt internet anymore so i havent been on alot lately... but its great to hear from all of you!!!! i feel loved!!!!

Posted by born2_idk March 3, 2010 04:01pm PSTReply | Report Abuse

heyy supp??

Posted by vengeanceclothingltd September 7, 2009 05:40pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

Hello

Posted by momoko_usada July 13, 2009 01:01pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

Hi!!!!
Has any 1 hve heard of J_POP music???
It is so good.
TOTAL FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by momoko_usada April 29, 2009 08:20pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

im so sad i hav no mre cell phne!!!
:(

Posted by xx miss you love xx April 15, 2009 02:09pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

hey whats up?
im keith

Posted by taylor ann April 6, 2009 09:34am PDTReply | Report Abuse

but the one i do like a little more than the rest is Shamen King its cool and it can mix u up a little with the fight seens

Posted by taylor ann April 3, 2009 08:18am PDTReply | Report Abuse

i dont have a favorite one i like them all!!!!=D

Posted by Reserved March 24, 2009 06:12pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

Wassup!!

Posted by Falling Angel March 15, 2009 02:54pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

hi

Posted by Yo Mamma March 12, 2009 12:35pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

yea they were pretty kool

Posted by Yo Mamma March 10, 2009 01:26pm PDTReply | Report Abuse

hey wats up?

Posted by momoko_usada March 7, 2009 11:38pm PSTReply | Report Abuse

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