"My ribs punctured my liver and cut it three-fourths of the way open."
I broke my index finger on a camping trip. I was holding a football for my midget uncle to kick. He kicked my finger instead and broke the tiny bone in it. Later on in life, I jumped off the wall at my grandma's above-ground pool and kicked him in the face and gave him a black eye.
Calcium deposit in hip
I had to get a calcium deposit taken out of my hip. I got it from slamming. I don't know what I was doing, typical young kid trying to skate a handrail or something. They just cut my hip open and slipped it out.
I have a permanent swellbow in my left arm. It sucks.
Staples in head
A long time ago, I was filming Brian Anderson doing some stupid trick, like trying to 50-50 a block to 360 flip out or something. Just as he was going for the 360 flip, he stuck and the board spun into my head. I had to get six staples in my head. My head hurt for a few days and I had a little bald spot where they shaved it to put in the staples.
I had really bad allergies in my left ear and nose for four months. It got so bad that I couldn't skate because my balance was off. It felt like my ear and nose were clogged. I started taking medicine and it went away.
Gabe Morford, Brian Anderson and I were at the Petaluma skatepark one day when I was about 20. There's a flatbar there that goes over a little gully. Gabe and I were cruising around in circles and I was grinding it every time. One time I was grinding it, slipped, flipped out and landed on my ribs. My ribs punctured my liver and cut it three-fourths of the way open. I couldn't breathe, so Gabe had to hold my hands over my head so I could get air. Once I could breathe again, some guy at the park offered me pot, but I didn't smoke it. Gabe drove me to the hospital, and I had surgery 45 minutes later. I got 25 staples in my stomach and couldn't stand up straight for three months.
I've sacked it a shitload of times. One time I was with Tobin Yelland—I was probably 16—and I lipslid this handrail and then sacked it and started
peeing blood. About a year later, Bobby Puleo sacked it on the same rail trying the same trick and pissed blood, too. The rail is like the sack-it-piss-blood rail.
I've had food poisoning like 20 times. It isn't an injury, but it isn't fun. I had food poisoning so bad once in Egypt that they had to send a lady to hook me up to an IV and give me all my fluids back. I think it was because Brian took a picture in the pyramids, and I was standing close to him. I think it was some sort of Egyptian curse. So it was Brian's fault again.
I smashed it open and had to get four stitches. I think I was kickflipping over some rail, landed with one foot, and my board torpedoed into my shin and sliced it open.
I've probably sprained both my ankles 20 times each. You can subtract about six months out of my skateboard career for my left ankle and about three months for my right.
Broken big toe
I broke my right big toe from ollieing over a bar in some slip-on Vans when I was 15. It was a head-high drop, and I landed straight on my toe. The ball part of it was super huge. I was out for three weeks. I don't know whose fault it was, probably mine. I think it was before I knew Brian. It was the right-before-Brian injury, like, "You're going to start skating with this dude, so here's a broken toe. Get ready for some more bullshit to happen."
Bob Kronbauer and I were at the bar one night. As we were going home, Bob found an old computer monitor on the sidewalk. Our friend Tyler convinced Bob it might be a good idea to throw it through the window at Hollywood Video. Bob didn't think twice about it and chucked the monitor through the window while some lady was returning a video. The alarm went off, so we had to run home, you know? While I was running, I clipped the bumper of a car with my knee really hard and had to hide under a porch for a while to make sure we didn't get caught. Then I went home. I couldn't skate for two weeks.