Noteworthy-Amazing Moments 4-4

More moments to evoke magic feelings of amazement. Let your imagination take you to that special place deep within your brain just past the silly gland. Did you find it? It’s squishy and slimy.-C.C.

Dastardly Duo Dogs Dorian
While minding his own business and fulfilling his obligation as a pro surfer, Shane Dorian dropped in on a good wave at Backdoor only to be peed on dog-leg style by a tandem surf duo. Dorian commented after viewing the photos, “It all happened so quickly. I dropped in, started a bottom turn, and wham! Burning-hot urine sprayed my leg. It was hot and horrible.” The duo was unavailable for comment.

Balinese Bullslider Asks, “What The Buck?”
The young Balinese bullsliding board bandit is at it again! Shown here at his favorite wave, or should we say “ring,” the Balinese bullslide-board surf championship is on again after two injuries last year caused the event to be cancelled. One unlucky bullslide finalist bucked his own balls and broke his butt, and another bullslider broke his bucking back. The finals will take place at the best bucking left in the world, Padang Padang.

Surfboard Tester Thinks With His Head
James Gilmore of San Clemente, California is a surfboard strength tester who uses a system of analysis some say is brutal and even damaging. James paddles out into the surf and goes for the same standard lipper on each wave, but the only thing that separates him from the normal surfer is that he smashes his face on the board on purpose every time. “I like to see if the glass pressure-dings or dents. Merricks and M10s hold up really well to my facial snaps.”

James has a broken nose and a cracked jaw at this point, but he’ll be back testing boards as soon as April.