We all have those days or weekends when we feel grungy. Some people, however, live that way all the time.
These are dirtbags — the outdoor people who spend every winter renting snow gear to visitors and every summer pushing rubber on the water for rafting customers.
They are the fringe members of society. Wonder if you’re a dirtbag? Here are some very telling signs that just may prove that you most certainly are.
You have just the one dreadlock
Hippies pride themselves on their twisted, beaded braids, but dirtbags keep their hair manageable with the exception of the one dreadlock that somehow reappears after every long adventure out in the woods or on the road.
The dread is usually made from the back bottom strands tucked underneath all the other tangled, but un-dreaded, hair. Are you guilty of finding that single dread, even just once? You may be a dirtbag.
Your drinks are homemadeLeave the ultra-hoppy IPAs to the hipsters. Dirtbag paddlers take pride in perfecting the clearest, smoothest (or at least the strongest) moonshine on the black market.
Apple pie is also a great holiday flavor, and cherry is good year-round. If not, beer by the case works just fine. Do you bring any of these homemade drinks to parties? You might be a dirtbag.
You’re no stranger to the mulletRaft guides have been rocking the mullet since way before Tyler Bradt’s studly photo made its debut in CANOE & KAYAK.
Business in the front allows for good eyesight, and the party in the back keeps one’s neck from getting too burned. Have you ever had a mullet? Even just once, as a gag? If so, you just might be a dirtbag.
You get pure joy from taking slamsNailing a move or running some gnarly line perfectly are great reasons to be happy — fulfilled, even.
What makes a dirtbag stand out is how happy he or she remains even after screwing up a line and paying for it with bruises, cuts, a black eye or even a broken nose. (In whitewater paddling circles, it’s called “beatering.”)
At any point, have you ever come up laughing after a bike wreck or a swim over a rapid? If yes, all signs are pointing at dirtbag.
You spend 150-plus days on the “job”Whether it’s paddling down Tennessee’s Ocoee River or skiing Mount Snow in Vermont, dirtbags have such an intense love of their chosen outdoor pursuit that they’ve devoted their careers, homes and the majority of their lives and free time to doing what they love.
How many days a year have you spent pursuing your outdoor passion? If the number is above 150, you might be a dirtbag.
You’ve got some dirtbag memoriesThere are some people who are either on the cusp of becoming a dirtbag or were once a dirtbag and then retired to normal society life.
They can recount either bygone days of dirtbag life or confess to a few moments here and there. They usually bring some nicer beer to a shindig — maybe a Sierra Nevada Pale Ale — but every once in a while they will throw down hardcore with the true-blue dirtbags.
Did you do any of the above even once? You may have been a dirtbag.