Go Time 3-7

The Top 44 Issue

As a magazine, you go out on a limb by ranking anything. No matter how thorough a job you do or how much you believe in the final results of your labors, you’re always going to piss people off. Some will be hurt by being left out, and others will feel slighted because they weren’t ranked high enough. When the idea of dedicating an entire issue to “The Top 44” came up, we decided to make a list of reasons why we should even attempt such a potentially tedious feat.

So we had a seemingly endless succession of meetings, and in the end decided the pros outweighed the cons, and knowing we were about to give ourselves a headache, we went for it. Some of the more fingernail-sensitive critics of our magazine are probably going to freak out, so if you really need to know the reason for doing a Top 44 Issue, here are our top ten:

The Top 10 Reasons To Do A Top 44 Issue

10. The Freelance Dentistry And Gratuitous Nudity Issue didn’t make it past AOL/Time Warner censors.
9. Marketing department’s need for a new sales “gimmick.”
8. According to polling numbers collected by the Circulation Association of America, magazines with numbers on the cover are hot sellers (as long as the numbers aren’t green, the cover blurbs are strategically placed, a fifth color is used, and the words “hot, wild sex” appear in greater than 100-point type).
7. Current use of the number 44 a bit boring.
6. Due to the staff’s nineteen-hour workweek, a TransWorld SURF Top 420 or Top 666 would be virtually impossible.
5. Good way to get a free remote-control surfer.
4. In focus groups it tested better than our Special 2.5-Year Anniversary Special or our double-thick Tribute To Medicaid issue.
3. Because it would behoove us.
2. Sick of hearing team managers say, “Volcom got the cover again?”
1. People just weren’t really feeling the Irie Tree Barrels Issue.