Stork Arrives Carrying A Bundle of Sales Director Joy
San Clemente, Ca – April 23, 2001 – At the annual Monday Morning coffee chat and collaborative donut dip, VonZipper today announced the birth of Brendan “Brother B” Hanley into the VonZipper Family. Brother B who will be handling the Director of Sales Portion of the family tree brings a wealth of experience to the growing eyewear family unit.
Brendan Hanley’s prenatal experiences would make any momma proud.
20 years comprehensive ASR sales and marketing experience
Retail Slave 10 years, 2 stores
Arnette boy 5 years, nudity, drunken, fun, trail blazed brand to #1
Sims Snowboards screw twister, same as above, just colder
Chief fry cook, Brother B’s Burger Tour, 1 tranny, 2 brake jobs
Redsand from the start, grew biz to $17mil, Vice President sales & Operations
One man army, sales mgr of 15, marketing, merchandise, design, promotions
Mayor of the East Coast
Married 10 years, high school HUNBUN
Curran Hanley, “Big C”, 6 yrs, regular foot
Trevor Hanley, “Sonic”, 5yrs, regular foot
Ian Hanley, “Lil Fella”, 3 yrs regular foot – don’t piss this one off, cuz he’ll get ya
Brother B’s Birth Weight puts him well above the 90th Percentile
In addition to a record birth weight, Brother B’s relationships with both specialty and major retailers, as well as an extensive understanding of what it takes to grow from an infant to a toddler made even the head pediatricians at Billabong to give Brother B two slaps on the ass because he’s so sweet.
“When Biggzy told me we were expecting a director of sales, I was excited, but never in my wildest dreams did I think the stork would bring us Brother B!” said a proud G.T. “We’ve had so many things to be thankful for in our first year as a family, and this bundle of joy will certainly make the ancestors at ease with the future of the lineage and besides, he comes with a shiny new high chair” rejoiced a recovering Big B.
VonZipper Marries East With West
VonZipper is dedicated to connecting both Coasts and the dirt in-between with a high protein sunglass formula mixing West Coast Sport with East Side Steez, and a melting pot of management experience. With Six new offspring styles, JuJu, All Day, SPF, Fernstein, Flash and Modge expected early May 2001, the VonZipper household will be an everlasting Birthday Party.
1046 Caller Recodo
San Clemente, CA 92673